walking our path

Wow, the last 36 hours have been rough.

A violent Nor’easter really just ripped through my world. Three boats went adrift here at the club during this Storm.

I experienced 60 knot winds for much of one night, and a hard gale for the rest of the time. I also had some damage to the bow. A bronze hawse pipe got trashed along with some surrounding fiberglass. If you know anything about Westsail construction you would understand the magnitude of the force of nature that Eleanor and I just endured. That kind of wind against a 2 knot current makes for extremely unpleasant and dangerous conditions. I went through three sets of mooring lines as they chafed quickly in the violent swells and had to stay on deck most on the night. I’m bruised up, cut up, and soar as hell after falling and sliding down the length of my starboard deck. The mooring I was on was slowly dragging, and I towed it about 250 feet to the South-West, and towards the Tapanzee Bridge.

I haven’t seen weather like this since hurricane Isabel which many of you remember from my first film which is now available for free on the welcome page.

These 36 hours were also a hard time for me psychologically. I was cold to the bone, wet, and reassessing all my decisions around the purchase of this boat. My time here in New York has not been easy, especially being away from my wife and the tranquil lifestyle we have in Panama.

On the darkest and coldest of nights I just tried to vision being home aboard Splendid with my wife, surfing, diving, and playing in the warm water. I asked myself over and over, “Why? What have I done to deserve this?” as I tried to warm my face with numb freezing hands on Eleanor’s deck throughout the night. “I thought I was on the right path? I thought this was the right thing to do?” I had good foul weather gear but had not gotten gloves or boots yet, a mistake I will
not soon forget.

My wife, who is more often my spiritual counselor, simply reminded me that it’s my path and the light will prevail. She reminded me of all the signs, and people who are supporting our efforts, in my heart I knew she was right. Some of you might not think life is all about sea turtles and rainbows, but if you choose your path with Love, it is what you make it. In my case it is sea turtles and rainbows, and the occasional hellish storm.

Waking up this morning after a 10-hour sleep in wet socks I realized that in fact it was for the best. This nameless storm forced me to realize the pure magic and love in my life. Every 10 years I need to battle a storm it seems, and every 10 years I become a little stronger on the other side of it, and this is how I break-in my Westsails!

Being on a mooring with no engine is not the best idea in the world. And I much would have preferred my 80lb Manson supreme anchor. If I had an engine, dealing with weather like this is not a real big issue, I could have found a safe anchorage, or at the very least held fast on my own ground tackle.

I asked so nicely if I could stay (and pay) at the Petersen’s boat yard for another week so that I might install my engine while I was on the hard. I didn’t want to be helpless in the water without propulsion and nearly lost Eleanor a few times during the past 36 hours. The owner of Petersen’s would have nothing to do with it as I am not a commercial vessel and he wants to deal with only commercial vessels from now onward. I told him “you realize my steering is disconnected, I have no engine, and there is a potential hurricane (Gonzalo) approaching”. He just would not let me stay for another week. He takes great joy in abusing and belittling the people around him, I feel so sorry for the men that work there. I’ve heard him yelling and barking at them on numerous occasions.

I asked him to wait until the morning to put Eleanor in the travel lift as the bottom paint was wet (3 days before I had to be in the water) and that it would damage my hull’s paint. He started yelling at me at the top of his lungs (F’this, F’that, and F’you) he screamed at me pointing his finger in my face, “YOUR A TYPICAL F’N SAILOR” he shouted, and I could feel he wished he could hit me. Trust me when I tell you I was only kind and respectful to the people around Petersen’s.

I assume he doesn’t like sailors because they like to do their own work on their boats as opposed to paying the yard to do it? “Yourrrre outta her” he motioned like an angry baseball umpire to wrap up his little performance showing his employees how powerful he was.

What really amazed me is this man turned around and did a little dance as he wobbled away singing “I win, I win, I win” like an evil Elmer Fud. He then got in his big diesel truck dawning large plastic testicles attached to the trailer-hitch, and drove off leaving everyone to enjoy a moment of peace in the absence of his poisonous company. I suppose it is not legally a requirement for the owner of a ship-yard to take any responsibility for the safety of others, nor did he consider it an ethical obligation. The previous week he threatened not to put me in the water as the previous owner of Eleanor owed him money. I told him that it wasn’t my responsibility and he roughly told me “THAT’S NOT HOW THE WORLD WORKS, I ONLY WANT CASH, YOU DON’T GO IN THE WATER UNLESS I GET CASH!” I thought to myself that this man has absolutely no clue as to how the world works outside of his little sand box. 

My father had the same kind of deep hatred and rage as he suffered much abuse as a child. I’m glad he left my mother and I when I was 4. Sometimes it hurts to see the world and people for what they are, and what has become of them. Men can be so cruel if they are not nourished with Love properly.

I’m not an overly intelligent or talented man, however I believe my gift is the ability to see things, and write about them, in a more detailed perspective as I don’t preoccupy my time with the pursuit of material things (money), and spend most of my time trying to understand and contemplate the world around me.

I must say that I’m happy to leave the Petersen’s boat yard in my wake although the guys that work there are fantastic. I’m now surrounded by nice people at the Nyack Boat Club. My engine should be ready mid next week as they are waiting for a part before they can put the engine on the Dyno and bench test it.

The commodore here is a good guy, along with my new friend Bill. The Nyack Boat Club is a community of sailors (for the most part) who just love sailing, and helping others who also love sailing.

I’ve found myself thinking about leadership lately, and what it is to be a captain. You cannot be given a license to be a good captain or leader. It is something that one holds in their heart, and something the people that follow him know in theirs. Good men are led by good leaders.

Humans are a eusocial society, and we have distinct leaders, and followers. One is not better or higher than the other, it is just the way it is. Unfortunately in western society men are led by money, and the people who possess it. And what is even more unfortunate is often the men who possess it have no business leading men as they lack honor, dignity, and the aptitude to lead with ability.

The sea, and the men of the sea know this, as nature can be fierce. If you put three men on a boat, and the shit hits the proverbial fan, one man is the leader no matter what any paper or rank says, we are who we are.

I hope you guys enjoy the new website. Unfortunately you will have to sign up again. There are some great new features and I’d like everyone to upload pictures and fill out your profiles so I know who you are and what you look like. I’ve been conversing with many of you for weover a decade now and it would be nice for me to put a face with your comments and emails.

If anyone is interested in a charter deal in Panama let me know. Money is really tight with the purchase of Eleanor and I really want to buy an autopilot for my trip south. We are offering two charters for 7 nights all meals included for a single person, couple or two friens at $900 (less than half the price, we usually charge $2,100) in order to raise the $1,800 which is what a new CPT autopilot costs. Remember that this will be a unique opportunity to be either one of the last people who come to share some time on Splendid with us or the first who come stay on Eleanor.

I also want to thank Nico (my brother), Nick (the previous owner),Martin, Bruce, Ben Brown, Jeff from Vagabond graphics, Mamassa Linda (my mother in law), my Momma D, my cousin Steve, my digital guru and dear friend David, Shawn & Katie, Captain Paul, Darryl, and Tom Ersk
for your support and help.

Also I’d like to thank the following subscribers who helped me raise almost $1,000 in the last month. Todd Townsend, Steven Inglis, Steve Ferdinando, Shawn & Katie Eglseder, Henry Fierz, David Vargo, Karl Manzer, John Timmons, Sam Rodgers, Jeff Stubblefield, David Toste, Brett Reynolds, Kenyon Stuart, T&D Design, and Ryan Bradfield. I hope I didn’t forget anyone.

It’s these donations that provide me the knowledge that there is some worth to my words and images over the last decade. I suppose my business is inspiration, and providing men with encouragement to venture into the world on small boats. You are not crazy for wanting to do something different than the norm. I was re-reminded of this this by my friend David who sent me this video after I was questioning my path during the last 36 hours.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8rwsuXHA7RA

That’s it for today. I managed 10 hours sleep after skipping a night. I’m going to take it easy today as I’m really sore after getting beat up by this Nor’easter.

Peace.

Sail far and live slowly.

-alex

Published in Alex Dorsey