God, family, and love

We bought a new boat, a 1975, WestSail 42 “Rocinante” (Don Quixote’s horse), WAHOOOOOO!!!!!!!

I don’t often use the label “God” because it causes so much commotion amongst people. Even though I strongly disagree with organized religion, I am the most spiritual man I know. I refer to God as nature, and God has spoken to me!

The last week of my life has been so amazing tears have been pouring from my cheeks on so many occasions it is hard for me to count on two hands.

About a week and a half ago Carla told me that she felt something big was coming, no reason, just a tingle. The energy in our lives was simmering and about to intensify to an over-boil. I didn’t give it much thought.

I had the most amazing free dive of my life two days ago. Some of you know I’m apnea training (breathing exercises) for about an hour a day in order to increase my bottom time and hunting abilities. I can hold my breath between 2.5 and 3 minutes now and my goal is 4 minutes by my 50th birthday in July.

Well the other morning I woke up before the sun as usual and rowed to the reef a mile or so away.

I have been hunting the entrance to one particular cave about 40′ deep because it is teaming with snapper and always fills my plate. By the time I got to the cave I was surprised that I had no feeling to breathe and was a bit impressed with myself.

I’m fearful to enter caves but this one has a small opening at the top that fills it with dim light. I entered the cave and swam 15′ or so into it, the deepest I’ve ever been in a cave by far. I just sat on the bottom, I must have been there a few minutes just taking in the beauty. I wasn’t interested in shooting anything, just enjoying the moment. I have never teared in my mask underwater, this was a first, it was just too beautiful.

Minutes passed and it dawned on me how incredibly dangerous what I was doing was. Nobody knew where I was to recover my body if I lost my breath and I would spend eternity in this cave as I was so deep into it, and in a separate chamber than the main one. In no way was I fearful of anything and it was the best dive of my life.Thousands of fish were swimming around the beam of light shimmering from the ceiling as I looked up.

I casually left the cave after thanking the sea for the fish I took. I always calm the fish with my hand, and thank it before I thrust my blade into its brain to stop the pain. Then I calmly swam to the surface, PRICELESS! I wish I had a timer on me but it didn’t matter, I’m thinking well over 3 minutes.

A squall was passing and it was raining hard as I rowed home. It passed quickly and the sun kissed my back once again to warm my skin from the sea.

When I got home to Splendid, Carla was hanging laundry and I made us a nice fish lunch on the grill. Truly a beautiful morning!

As many of you know I allocate large amounts of time corresponding with my readers. My hope is to help inspire them to unplug and adopt a minimalistic sailing philosophy. The goal being a life of peace and tranquility sailing the world as a free man.

One of my readers who I converse with regularly (Richard) had been sending me a lot of emails.  He happened to mention to me that there was a WestSail 42 at auction on eBay. I didn’t think much about it as I am more than happy with my beloved Splendid and never gave a thought to buying another boat.

I don’t know if you remember Eleanor in gone in 60 seconds. It was a 1967 Shelby GT 500 Ford Mustang, and the car that Nicolas Cage’s character Memphis Raines could never steal. It was an illusive ghost that he cold never attain.

Well the 42′ WestSail is my Eleanor. Some of you may remember when I sold Namaste (28′ WestSail) when I was in Tahiti. There was a 42′ WestSail in Mexico asking 45k. I burned through my relaxing pacific crossing so I could get to Australia as fast as possible so I could get the money for the WestSail 42, I missed her by just two weeks. I searched high and low speaking to all the other owners of WestSail 42s trying to cut some kind of deal and just couldn’t make it happen. They were all just way out of my price range.

Well laying in bed I decided to check out the W42 on eBay, the asking bid was just $14,999. My heart stopped. “What if” was the thought bouncing around my skull like a bullet ricocheting around the inside of a steel sphere. After looking at the pictures of the boat I knew I had to try once again as she was calling me to be her captain.

The only problem was that between Carla and myself we had about $600 to our name. “Could I sell Splendid super cheap before the end of the auction”?

The previous week Carla and I had been looking at Greenland charts and dreaming of such an adventure. I’m ready for seasonal weather, I’ve been sweating between 20 degrees north or south of the equator too long, and Carla is from Patagonia. “But could Splendid really handle banging the ice around”? She has a strong hull. She isn’t a Hunter or Beneteau by any means, but she isn’t as strong as a steel boat either. I don’t want the maintenance or weight of a steel boat so I didn’t really entertain the idea of going to the ice with Splendid, too risky especially without insurance. The WestSail hulls are as close to having a steel hull as possible without the mess of chipping rust all the time.

Well Rocinante (The WestSail 42 on eBay) went from a dream to an obsession once again. I showed Carla the boat and she freaked out. She said she had never seen a layout that she liked better than Splendid’s until now and that she loved the idea as much as me, but how?

I told a few people Splendid was available for a quick sale (contingent upon me buying Rocinante) for a giveaway price of whatever it cost me to get into Rocinante. Well, 4 days is just too quick to sell a boat at any price. We had a very stressful week and I couldn’t sleep until the damn auction was over, “would something not present itself”?

Well my awesome brother-in-law decided to loan us some money so we could take a shot at the auction. If I had the money I would have placed a $100,000 snipe to insure it. So on the last day of the auction we placed our bid and crossed our fingers, meditated, and asked the universe, not to bring us Rocinante, but just to bring us what is right for our path. We were sweating bullets for hours. We realized that we could bid a maximum of about 32k, we put an extra hundred just in case. About 20 minutes before the end of the auction I got an email from one of my readers and friend, who I have never met, instructing me to increase my bid by 5k, that I could pay it back whenever I could. We did, and amazingly won the auction at 37,100! The moment we won the auction Carla and I shouted a cry that would have woken the dead.

When you read the words I am about to write you must understand that in no way could I ever convey the magnitude of what happened to us, or capture the magic of the moment with any words, photographs, or videos. If you saw what I am about to tell you in a movie it would just be too cheesy to believe, you would laugh, and walk out of the theater.

Backup a few seconds. The eBay timer slowly crawls across the screen of my iPhone, 5,4,3,2,1. 30 endless seconds pass because we have horrible bandwidth, but we get the news we won the bid. We shout and embrace in a hug on Splendid’s bow. A huge sea turtle swims towards us with two remoras on its back along with a beautiful dancing jellyfish (all within 10 seconds of winning the bid). And I shit you not, a double rainbow formed over the anchorage. I burst into tears and literally fell to my knees, Carla whispered through her tears and awe “baby, it’s your mother”.
I have no words to write. It was just the purest moment of Love I have ever experienced in my life. Carla ran for a camera and retuned and was trying to get a photo. I said no, just sit and take it in, she managed one quick picture of the rainbow which in no way conveys what transpired in the moment, the world just stopped for us and I was able to have a few minutes with my mother and my wife.

I’ll never be afraid of entering an underwater cave again. My destination in life is clear and I will navigate it unafraid with only love in my heart. If I drown in a cave I couldn’t think of a better end to a magnificent life.

I’ve seen a turtle pop its head out of the water in the distance, and maybe catch an elusive glimpse here and there a few times, but never has one approached my boat and made a point of making eye contact with me with a smile.

If it was a dolphin, stingray or something like that I’d chalk it up to coincidence. But sea turtles are very weary of people here because every local hunts them for food and they know better. Carla had never seen a wild turtle in her life.

My mother (Halyna) died when I was 20, and my family fell apart. She was the glue that held everyone together. I’ve been a single-hander ever since I lost her whether on land or sea.

When I married Carla I was blessed with so much more. I have a real family once again. Any one of them would give a stranger the shirt off their back to keep you warm on a cold night. I am not only in Love with Carla but her entire family as well, they are the most amazing people that come from nothing and have little, but are willing to give everything. My kind of people!

Rocinante has come to us for reasons beyond my understanding, or perhaps because Splendid has plans for someone else, I don’t know. All I know is that my mother is alive and guiding me where I need to go. She is my navigator and I have unconditional faith in my path. She was built the year Carla was born, and I have to return to my home (New York) to gather her and start this next chapter of my life.

I am the luckiest man alive.

Nico (my brother-in-law), and Martin (my friend who shot us 5k at the right moment), I am forever in your debt! Richard, thanks for letting us know about the auction. Thank you all so very much for making this possible for Carla and I.

As I write this, tears are dripping on my iPad, I’m glad I got the waterproof case :)

I’m starting another adventure. Carla is staying behind to scrape, paint, and varnish. Splendid is ready to sail, but not for sale, if you know what I mean.

I’m flying to New York on Tuesday nearly penniless to rebuild an engine and get Rocinante back to Panama and my wife by the end of December so we can charter and sell Splendid. I have a few years to pay off my loan (not monthly) but want to get it done within one, Splendid will cover us :)

The first things I have to do in New York is find a jacket, some warm clothes, a sleeping bag, and a bicycle. I’ll have to scrape around for tools, rebuild an engine that is completely shot (water got in the cylinders) and just pull this thing out of my ass.

I’m flying into La Guardia airport and need to figure out public transportation to Nyack, New York. Once there I can stay on the boat and everything will get easier. I also want to slap some bottom paint on if I can and maybe change the cutlass bearing.

What a ride this is going to be. I’ll be posting blogs and videos often. I also need to figure out how to get a prepaid sim in my phone or iPad so I can stay in touch with Carla.

We are both so excited we can’t see straight.

Thanks for reading.

Only Love guys!

-alex

Published in Alex Dorsey