Sam's Blog

the purpose of things

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Thu, 27 May 2010 21:07:23 GMT

This afternoon found me reposing in the v-berth contemplating the purpose of mold. Finally accomplishing the task of putting Guinna’s room in order after the winning combo of chain locker/ chain plate leak on passage, i decided to give her ceiling the monthly mold inhibiting wipe down.This task is often rote and done quickly but as Alex was out , the Guinnesster otherwise occupied and Bowie somberly crooned on the stereo, i was given a bit of time for reflection on the subject.

I am the type of soul who will always seek to find the purpose of things. Even if said things are affecting myself negatively, i strive to see the bigger picture and their place in it. Today i believe i did, finally, for one of my biggest nemesis’ and can breath better (literally, i did just clean:) knowing my effort is not in vain for my enemy is a worthy one.

This is how it went..

After tossing out the traditional idea of decomposer (and possibly shouting aloud “but our boat is not dying” knowing the ridiculousness of that utterance for everything is , is it not?), i considered it’s diet, water. Mold decomposes water, of course you say, we know that, but do we truly appreciate it? All of the moisture that escapes us in our days aboard our floating homes is collected and centralized by this aggravating foe. The mold leads us to our leaks, allows us to repair them and then clean up with a bit of spray and rag. It is not always pretty, and in the worse case scenarios uber toxic but easier then sopping up loads of unchecked water or dealing with the catastrophe of a small leak missed and turned bigger.

Quite a liberating thought process, indeed, though i do consider the possibility that i am merely placating myself and whistling while i work.

Never the less, i sit writing this with a somewhat better acceptance of my endless task and new resolve. For now that i know my enemy, he is that much closer to defeat.

This moment is life

sam

Thank you Moms! or The best thing i have ever done

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Sun, 09 May 2010 13:02:06 GMT

I remember as a child putting forth the query “.. but why is their no children’s day?” to which i was promptly answered “everyday is children’s day”

Today as a mother i can certainly appreciate that thought. Truly, for many children, everyday is a day of praise and reward, treats and relaxation. I understand now how hard my mothers worked to feed and cloth me( and dads too, don’t worry, your day is coming";), the sacrifices they made to raise me into a self confident secure human being and the energy they expended turning even the smallest sweetness into something to be celebrated, not to mention the whole sharing their bodies with a sometimes hostile presence, a small dictator presiding over food choices and comfortable? sleeping positions.

Unfortunately, not all children are blessed as i. Neglected and ignored would be a step up for some indeed. And for others, the overabundance of treats completely unrelated to praise has a similar negative consequence.

I can easily say that Guinna is the best thing i’ve ever done. She (like ole’ Jackie says in As Good as it Gets) makes me want to be a better woman. She has shown me the capacity of my heart, and the poets are correct, it is indeed limitless.

So, i would like to suggest a radical change to mother’s day. Let us stretch it out a bit, make it a weekend. Let the first day celebrate the children, not just your own but all, like it says. Let them be kids, take them to parks or the beach, bike riding or roller skating. Be the mom you wish you could be everyday. Erase the lines, play, imagine, like a child, with your child and any other who needs you. Completely exhaust yourself, not doing chores or buffing the grindstone, but the good old fashioned way, knowing full well that tomorrow is all yours for the resting.

After all, without kids there would be no mothers, and as mothers, how better to enjoy our days.

And what a day it is…

Jamaica is truly majestic. Lush tropical mountains, markets teeming with its abundant harvests, and hot showers that mimic the waterfalls this land is so famous for. All surrounding a city that i feel warmth towards for it reminds me a bit of the Italian Market (Philly) on the weekends. I cannot wait to trek up into the mountains, swim in the blue lagoon (with my dark haired version of that handsome boy who later became a pirate) and deprive my senses in those falls…

Thank you to my mothers( you know, i have three) for your lessons and love from which i am able to be proud of the mother i am today and for the honest joyous tearful emotion i am overwhelmed by just thinking that thought. i wish all of you mothers such honor today.

this moment is life

sam

the big 5.. or

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 19:15:00 GMT

wow.. so much to scribe since we last met…

This story might have properly begun in Nassau...

Our first passport stamps.. The blinding realization of Bahamian inflation( it is unbelievable that the Bahamians pay $4 for the cheapest loaf of bread).. Amazingly available free(with the very occasional purchase) wifi at the Green Parrot, Nassau side.. The equally in your face division of those who have and those who don’t( Paradise island vs downtown Nassau).. An amazing conch salad and seriously potent Guinness special import (American Guinness’ randy cousin:) at the fish market, this was Guinna’s favorite place to people watch, she was absolutely mesmerized by the boys and their knife wielding prowess..

and... My first experience walking down a usually quiet street lined with storefronts containing what to me could only be deemed overpriced chatchkas on a day when the cruise ships arrived , bloated bodies walking too fast for comfort to achieve a proper level of vacation consumerism of merchandise that could surely be bought more leisurely at home.. Friends made (Britta and David aboard Anam Cara).. and ohhhh.. Our aquamarine cradle, an ocular treat which, alone, was more than enough to sustain our souls while the wind was ablowin’ …

but this story does not begin in nassau… It begins on a small scrap of land peeking up out of a peaceful transparent sea that hosts what could only be described as a conch nursery, hundreds of miniature conchs in graduated states of development lending a cheerful pink hue to the white and dark green scrubbed landscape… This bit of sand was where i took my first steps into the true isolation, the virgin wonder of the cruising life…

a love story begins…

It is difficult to put into words the metamorphosis one undergoes when the stresses of “civilized” life are removed.. I do believe i went through a bit of culture shock adjusting to the lessened pace of small island cruising.. I kept feeling as if there was a task to be accomplished that i was slacking, my mind inventing imaginary pressure as if it would not so easily let it’s favorite blanket go softly into the night..

My mind’s main plaything was guinna’s solitude.. No peers, only her mother as her playmate. Thankfully i have quite a bit of imagination and since laying off the java quite a bit more energy. I know, there are worse things indeed, like only seeing your mother for dinner and bedtime but, when you’ve been handed paradise only the purest of conscience put up no fight..

And what, do say, put an end to my late night round and round?

Snorkeling

Snorkeling is the magic

A simple pair of fins and mask, a plastic tube for breathing and suddenly my daughter has every fish and crab, conch and ray for playmates.. Finally, only days before her fifth birthday, did she come to the decision that now was the time to try out the apparatus Santa had delivered almost a year and a half ago.. and… Wow!.. She truly is the fish of her birthright for, from the first moment she allowed her protected eyes to register the wonderland that lived around her, felt the power of her aided legs and took her first breath floating in this familiar saline environ, she has never wanted to leave..

From that day on my soul has relaxed, every new barren landmass became a source of wonder.. Guinna now sees every shoreline as possibility, notices the caves and rocky bluffs.. Of course we are still very careful and limited to the swimming pool calm shallows but as a 5 year old, this poses little concern, especially when in our little protected holes we are privy to a visit from a giant sweet natured incredibly curious spotted eagle ray.. What a treat, we were all properly awed..

and the big 5…

Guinna had her fifth birthday just days ago and what a celebration it was. It began off bell island on Anam Cara with a pre-birthday, last night as a four year old celebration. Britta made pizzas (yum!) and a cake and we spent the evening reminising on Guinna’s last year and the many of ours..

Next was the breakfast in bed (per the birthday girl’s request) of pink pancakes (who knew pancake batter would melt red sprinkles) and the movie Hairspray (the remake,with John Travolta and Christopher Walken, a leftfield desire,we had watched it once together on a girls-only movie date) followed by a sail to Little Farmer’s Cay for a nice walk about and a call to Daddy, not until we had a bit of a snorkel though.. Lastly, we had a tea and cake finale aboard the good ship Splendid with our friends..

A big day indeed, with favorite treats interspersed throughout.. That night we slept soundly with dreams of Georgetown, our next destination, and the kids for Guinna to befriend therein, dancing through our heads..

And the birthday gods must have lent us favor because no sooner did we arrive in Georgetown and dingy over to the lovely beach on Stocking Island off which we are anchored than did we find not only a Owen, a seven yr old boy with whom guinna made quick friends, but also a 9 yr olds b-day party in full swing.. Yipee! life is good..

We are here for at least several weeks, awaiting a visit from my Mommy and possibly Guin’s Dad.. sitting in this beautiful anchorage and having just explored the good vibes of g-town, we don’t think that’s half bad…

this moment is life.. -sam

samantha bortnicker in twenty ten or where the haiti are all the cool flying cars?

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 16:22:14 GMT

seriously.. it’s not as if i was expecting, as we began to roll through the two thousands, the civilized infastructure of the jetson’s but at least something comparable to the practicality of the fifth element or maybe just high society experimentation reminiscent of michael j fox goofing on his hoverboard in back to the future.

technology has disappointed me, the aforementioned just the too sweet icing on a high fructose containing artificially colored birthday cake. i am not a complete luddite, really, we couldn’t even be having this “chat” if not for some of the cool and incredibly useful tools progressing technology has provided. in our (sailing) lives alone the resources available for safe passage-making alone have all but founded/inspired a resurgence of maritime adventurers, setting out on far less unpredictable voyages for the sake of the journey alone.

having said this and paid my homage to the gifts of our present tech culture, i must reassert my disappointment. but for all the iphones (wow are they cool!) and laser eye surgery (totally amazing also) people are still living without potable water and children die of malnutrition, all over the world- oftentimes right under our noses. fossil fuels continue to dominate and personal responsibility seems to have fallen out of trend like picture tube televisions.

everyone just moves so fast, with so seemingly little time to consider the harm being done by their imposter single passenger hummers. money is worshipped like an idol as we work through our family’s dinner time, commuting with one hand while eating a non sustainably manufactured barely nutritional “healthy” fast food chicken sandwich.

we often ride our bikes alone (guinna, alex and i) down the side of the road, smiling for the fresh air (i’m ignoring the exhaust) and exertion, peering into the small boxes of people, looking for a shared moment of joy but more often receiving the dead stare of the numb overly taxed suburban traveler.

someone once said to me “well not everyone can live like you do” and i suppose that’s true for it is an existence not for the meek at heart, one’s levels of comfort must be very fluid and you must have a fair amount of the black sheep gene. for me though, this life is splendid. in my land life i had taken to feeling guilty for every step i took supporting a culture i did not believe in and too increasingly often the squared walls of a traditional domicile felt more like confinement then safe haven.

so in this new year , for all the misteps i have taken (and wow i am but an egg after all ), the few regrets i have and the occasional longing for more easily accessed old friends, every morning i wake up feeling free. i bake my bread and ride my bike, teach my daughter and attempt everyday to learn a new skill towards further sustainability… and i breath… and i smile and the world goes on turning faster and i can benefit from the positive bits and say no to the systems that used to force my hand and leave me so disappointed .

so i guess, in the end;), i say you can keep your flying cars (though you won’t see this girl saying no to an offered ride) i’ll sail…

this moment is life… sam

Sunbeam

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 11:07:52 GMT

the rise and fall of the sunbeam or you don't know what you've got 'til it's(almost) gone...

let me begin by stating( with a tear in my eye..or two... ok, i admit it i'm a bit of a mess) i sure do miss her.. what first may come to mind upon hearing my lament,if you know me and my everpresent 4 foot sidekick, is guin, and though i do miss her like i might my right arm or sense of touch, i know i will soon see her again, inshallah.. but my new old sunbeam bread mixer/kneader/awesome mess saving tool is possibly a whole 'nother story.. see, our brief friendship began only 72 hours ago. i knew her for years, an aquaintance that was gifted to me by my uncle(who obviously recognized the power of the sunbeam when i was still way in the dark)and sat in a cupboard gathering potential. honestly, i almost gave her away, she is a bit bulky, but i could not having never really given her a spin. the reason for this being that i am a bit old fashioned. i like kneading dough, we have a perfectly good wooden table for messing up with flour, the key word being mess. the elbow grease is not an issue but by the time the bread is in the oven flour covers the entire salon and has generally made it's way into the cabins as well. enter senora sunbeam..on a lark, as bread baking approached, alex and i decide to finally see whether senora can make the rent.. and boy! forget the rent the girl is after a lease. what was once a production is now a vinette- one worthy of a standing ovation. i did decide to still mix and fold by hand but the dusty kneading was done graciously by senora.. yes,yes,yes, energy is consumed but the sun is providing it and truly, either the sun powers me and my arms do the work (cleaning being the worst of it) or le soliel powers senora and i am free to ground the pesto that so righteously accompanies the final yeasty product..

on another note i hope everyone's holdays were warm and fuzzy, bubbly merry and full of shalom.. look forward to a somewhat reflective (like tarnished silver) new year's log as one of my resolutions is to be a more faithful scribe..

and... garlic garni rocks! almost as much as that yummy apple chutney...

this moment is life

sam

feng shui is not just for land lubbers

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 14:18:16 GMT

and our new boudoir proves it..

our home has a honey(s) do list a mile long but one that i have been urging towards the top of the list since summer crept up on us is the renovation of our bedroom.. specifically the size of our bed... oh, hot, hot summer... when the chill of winter wrapped us in a cocoon of blankets and body heat was a commodity, the twin bed alex and i share seemed like overkill.. we had room a plenty, but when the first tendrils of summer were launched like the roots of so much new life in spring, the bed we slumbered upon began to feel a bit confining.. gone was the uninterupted REM of babes and we welcomed in the age of tossing and turning and sometimes downright cranky bedtimes.. i have no interest in ac, even as a house dweller i always enjoyed being acclimated to my environment.. always with a thin layer of perspiration but, unless laboring hard, never downright dripping with sweat.. so really the only option was increasing the size of our bed.. we really schemed and never came up with a simple solution until we stayed aboard Fisaga( marty's hunter 38) see, cheoy lee designed two aft cabin styles for our ship; a crew style and the center queen. ours was the crew style. our aft cabin bed space formed a U shape with a twin both on port and star side and filled in across the stern.. our home is so lovely but our bedroom, the place that should be a sanctuary, a place of peace and relaxation, never felt like anymore then a bunk in camp, and it was partially due to the fact of it being a mostly emotional need that it was neglected for so long.. so many other more important life sustaining systems needed work that the importance of a good nights sleep was underestimated and ignored... then we stayed on Fisaga, slept in a queen size bed and came home motivated , but almost more importantly, with an idea. see, we had considered enlarging the port side bunk and on the flip side, making a center queen but both required major renovation which we really didn't want to spend the time doing(right now). what we had not considered was enlarging the back bunk to create a queen longwise across the stern.. wow.. it was such a simple fix and, truly, it creates a bed that flows seamlessly in the cabin... it doubles our sleeping area and, besides sacrificing a small seat, takes away no space.. and it only cost us $98. for the queen foam mattress and some scrap as a foundation to lay across what was the seat. then we used a sharpie to mark the port and star foam and cut the needed leeway with an electric knife.. now all that is needed is to upholster the cut foam (on the side bunks) and we will have a seamless amazing sleeping area.. we also have some big plans for the newly created storage space but that can wait.. this morning was our first awakening in our new space and it is a brand new world. plus,we have learned that the proper flow of your home(even emotionally) is an incredibly important life sustaining system after all.. this moment is life.. sam

guin returns

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 13:50:34 GMT

yay wifi!... yay guinna returns!

well almost, she's about 2 hours away.. what a magnificent 10 days it has been- all boyfriendy girlfriendy.. just two kids goofing off.. to be honest though, the only difference is that usually it is 3 kids goofing off:.. but ,as all parents know, it is sweet indeed when you can touch base and focus on your partner (and only your partner) for a couple days.. really, a half hour is bonus sometimes, 10 days-wow! all that said, i cannot wait to see my little guinnesster.. i do so miss her laugh and i know she's probably grown an inch.. capt paul- of course i remember you, though after that champagne of yours @ the party i would have a great excuse not to;) garlic, garlic, garlic, one can never say enough and for sure i am still greatly anticipating sampling your culinary endeavors.. indeed most people underestimate this powerhouse and many others fear it's intensity but alex and i both love nothing more than cooking a lovely meal and saving the garlic for last, pressing it in in all it's raw glory.. i did learn an interesting fact though- when preparing garlic (if you are not leaving it raw) it is best to let it sit for 10 minutes after cutting to allow all of it's beneficial properties to stew and steep and gather their strength before tossing them in the skillet.. as for the mailing address, i will get that to you asap.. to everyone else thank you for the wonderful welcome - i certainly look forward to much more reciprocal wandering (mind) while we wander otherwise... this moment is life- sam

a day of bridges.

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 19:07:25 GMT

hey all, sam here.. my first log, so exciting! thank you for this david, i am honored by your time and effort...

a day of bridges

twenty four of them to be exact.. imagine it, only three on demand and alex and i crunching numbers and making bets on the probability of making the next opening.. twenty four bridges and a time line (albeit a loose one) also make for a late day and, with the fall backward, some motoring in the dark.. but darkness means using the super cool handheld spotlight and, my favorite part, getting a closer look at some of the grandiose homes on the icw.. it really is like flicking channels on the television driving down the ditch after dark.. this family sitting down for dinner, the next pacing on the phone or getting ready for an evening out.. in the daytime, indeed, i can appreciate some of these homes but mostly they, no matter how large and landscaped, seem way too close together and a bit out of place.. at night though, with their lights and a glimpse of the life and style of those inside, these homes and the development-congested river itself become almost dreamy, especially with the cool weather of this thursday evening and an anchorage with wide open spaces.. now all there is to do is enjoy a wonderful meal ( i salivate as i write, the scent of it's creation luring me in) and cross my fingers for a less obstructed tomorrow..

this moment is life... -sam

Coming soon...

alex@projectbluesphere.com — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 04:16:00 GMT

Sam's blog is coming soon...

More...